My Testimony//Part 3
Okay, so in the last post, we left off with me stating that I believed God's plan was better than mine, but I didn't trust in His process.
After a few months, I had at least realized that I was in this situation, so I might as well try to make the best of it. I started to try and apply myself at the different churches. I started a sermon notes journal, as that helped me to better pay attention in church. I (kind of, sort of) tried to reach out and talk to some of the teenagers at the different churches. For some reason, though, this extrovert, for once in her life, didn't feel like talking to people. And yet I expected everyone to want to be friends with me. I remember complaining to my mom one Sunday afternoon that no one was talking to me. "Well, did you try talking to them?" Uhhh kinda? I think I had walked over to a group of girls and said hello, and they seemed friendly, and said hello back. But as I didn't really try to continue a conversation, they eventually started a conversation about something that had happened at their latest sleepover. Of course, I had not been there, and so I sat in silence. Do I blame the girls? Not at all. They were friendly, and I got as far as getting their names, but since I wasn't exactly a ray of sunshine to be around, they talked to each other. I had one or two people that I would hang out with at each church we visited, but I didn't feel like I had any real friends, except for one church. For the sake of not confusing churches together, I will call this church "Church A."
Church A was familiar to me, as it was the church that my Nana goes to. I had been to different events at this church over the years, and because of this, I knew several people from the church. In July 2019, I went to the youth group's Vacation Bible School, and there I was able to meet more people. The girls at this church were so accepting and friendly. There were also a lot of people my age, which at the other three churches wasn't the case. Most were either middle schoolers or guys. Don't get me wrong, I can hang out with both of those, but it is nice to have people your age to talk to. Furthermore, Church A's youth group started having a small group Bible study every Wednesday night, with 6 or 7 girls in the same grade as me!! Church A in particular really started to stand out to me as my favorite church. By far. I was finally feeling accepted somewhere, and I thoroughly enjoyed going to this church. Unfortunately, we didn't go to this church very much. As the months went on, my parents started going to one church (which I will call Church B) for multiple weeks in a row, rather than switching churches every week. This was nice in one aspect, as it gave me more security in knowing where we were going to church every week, but it also meant that I got to visit Church A less often. Furthermore, Church B's youth group consisted mostly of middle schoolers, which was fine, but like I said, it was nice to be around people my age.
For several months, we hardly went to any other church other than Church B. My parents seemed to really like this church, and the pastor had actually visited our house once. I had (almost) worked it out in my mind that we would be joining Church B. I had learned a lot that past summer, and while I wasn't necessarily happy about joining Church B, I knew that God's will was better than mine, and I was *finally* beginning to trust God in the process. October rolls around, and I'm asking the Lord, "Okay, so it appears that we're going to join Church B. So, when will you give Dad a peace to join the church?" I got no response. Well, I thought, since we haven't officially joined yet, I would still like to visit Church A as much as possible. So, one Saturday in November, I asked my Dad if we could go back to Church A the next day. Oh, I forgot to mention, we had ruled out the other two churches a while back. The decision was down to the final two churches. Anyways, Dad agreed to go to Church A the next day. We went, and it just so happened that the pastor started a series that Sunday: "Remember Lot's Wife." I'll never forget that series, because it was so, so good! The next week, I begged my Dad to go again, as I truly wanted to hear the rest of the series. So we did. I think the series lasted 4 weeks, and then I expected to go back to Church B. However, even after the series ended, we continued to go to Church A. I was beyond excited, as you can imagine, but I was still wary that one day, my parents would tell us we were going back to Church B. However, we spent all of December at Church A. January 2020 rolled around, and we were still continuing to visit Church A. One cold morning, my family got in the car after church, and my Mom and Dad had a conversation with their eyes. They never spoke a single word, but from the back seat, you could tell they were having a whole conversation. Then Dad cleared his throat, which always means he's about to say something important, normally a family announcement. He spoke up and I'll never forget what he said: "Girls, we've decided to join Church A." If I hadn't been buckled into the seat, I would have probably jumped up and down with pure joy. Instead, I started crying. I'm not typically an emotional person, but I was filled with so much thanks and gratitude for my God that the tears just spilled over. All of the unknowns, all of the tears I had cried asking "why?", all of the minutes I had spent praying, it all came together. In my heart, I was praising God. It all makes sense now! I understand now, Lord! Your plan is truly greater than mine!
While you might think this is the end, it's not. There is still one more part to my testimony, which will be posted tomorrow.